8 Important Reasons Why You Should Not Spank Your Child. #7 Will Make You Think Twice

Parents have felt some guilt that they may have gone overboard with their disciplinary action.

6. Spanking often leaves the parent feeling guilty. Most parents are aware that spanking is now a controversial parenting method. Even the American Academy of Pediatrics has come out against spanking. But even before this, many parents could sense that something was not right about hurting a child “for his own good,” and feel guilty afterwards. Source: ActiveParenting.com


Any parent who loves their child dearly is bound to also feel the hurt and guilt after spanking their child. As parents, we need to have confidence in our parenting methods.

If your approach to resolving an issue with your child brings about feelings of guilt, then you might like to look into better approaches of discipline or resolving issues that you will have more confidence in.


Frequent spanking has been found to cause this potentially troublesome long-term effect

It has been found that there is a direct correlation between mental illness and high incidences of childhood spanking.

7. Spanking can increase the likelihood of developing mental health symptoms. According to this study, links have been found from later mental health diagnoses to higher incidents of childhood spanking for disciplinary purposes. I am willing to bet that when spanking your child, your intention wasn’t to create long-term psychological problems. Source: PsychCentral.com


Michele Knox, a psychiatrist who studies family and youth violence at the University of Toledo College of Medicine agrees with those findings.

Dr. Knox says:

Spanking and other forms of corporal punishment have a huge variety of negative outcomes, and almost no positive outcomes. Those negative outcomes include aggressive behavior and delinquency in kids.

Furthermore, research studies have found that harsh physical punishment in the absence of child maltreatment can also be associated with the following:

  1. mood disorders
  2. anxiety disorders
  3. substance abuse/dependence; and
  4. personality disorders

These research findings surely are worth thinking about as your child’s future may depend on how you instill discipline with them now.

If you think giving your child some whooping is the ultimate answer to misbehaving, think again.

Spanking is not the answer as there are other ways for you to deal with a misbehaving child.

8. There are many more effective methods of discipline. The bottom line in all of this is that there are better ways to discipline kids in our modern society — methods such as polite requests, “I” messages, firm reminders, logical consequences, active problem-solving … These methods not only solve behavior problems but also help build such qualities of character as responsibility, cooperation, courage, respect and even self-esteem. Source: ActiveParenting.com


According to Dr. Bryan Carter, Ph.D., a pediatric psychologist and professor in the U of L Department of Pediatrics/Bingham Clinic, and director of the Pediatric Consultation Service at Kosair Children’s Hospital:

While spanking may give the child a signal as to what NOT to do, it fails to teach the important skills of problem solving and decision making, that is, what TO DO.

The above are just some of the few reasons why I don’t spank my child. I also think that you should not either.

There are much better ways to discipline a child which do not involve any form of physical harm. You can check them out here.

If you by any chance have the urge to spank your child, please pause and give it some serious thought. I’m sure you can do a better job of parenting your child without any form of spanking.

If you agree with this article, please do feel free to pass this along and let other parents know why spanking is not a solution for disciplining a misbehaving child.

What’s your position on spanking? Is this an acceptable form of discipline or not?

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13 thoughts on “8 Important Reasons Why You Should Not Spank Your Child. #7 Will Make You Think Twice

  1. I was spanked by my mom a child when i acted out. I respect her for if. I treat everyone with respect and kindness. I dont back talk. I dont act better then others. I dont start figjts5like some have posted. I never hit another child or person in general. I never was affected how this post states. It turned me into the person i am today. I spank my child when he acts out or refuses to mind. I dont abuse the power of spanking nor do i abuse my child. We sit down and i explain to him what he did and he hasnt had any repeats. He doesnt act out in any alternative manner to get even. Nor does he disrespect anyone. He is a sweet loving happy child. I pop Him just enough to get his attention as my parents did me. I was put in time out lost items i enjoyed or got spanked when i acted out. Perfectly fine.

  2. All I got to say is I whip all three of my older boys! I am not gonna deal with disrespect nor am I gonna have a bunch of hellians running and nobody else should have to deal with it either. My children love me just as much as I love them. I got whipped as a child and I now understand why. I don’t do drugs, I don’t party, I have my own home (that i raise my kids in) and to this day I DO NOT disrespect the elderly. And my kids are being raised the same way! My children don’t hardly get in trouble because they are well behaved . And yes we have all kinds of fun and have family days and etc. You can raise your kids how you want. In not judging, but my focus is on raising young boy into well respected, well mannered young men, who go far in life and is successful! My children know they can always come to me and they know that you cant always succeed the first time. In my opionion my children are happy and content in their home and I’m raising them right ☺

  3. I spanked each of my children only once, and once was enough. I had told them what they were doing was wrong and if they did it again, they would be spanked. So they tried to see if I would follow through and I did. After that incident, all I ever said was no do not do that or there would be consequences. Each step comes with I love you, but what you are doing is wrong. Remaining calm and stern without the screaming is a must,

    1. Absolutely consistency builds trust between the child and the parent. Beating a child, absolutely not. A pop on the hand worked for me. A spank on the behind without really hurting them because of the padding they have will still get the message across. Also you are right, don’t spank out of anger but out of love for the future of your child. Again beating or abusive hitting of a child especially around the face is in my opinion terrible.
      You can also use the time out method, where light spanking might be needed to let them know you will enforce the time out. I believe you that you only had to spank once. Good for you

  4. BS. If my kids have an ounce of my DNA, they’re gonna need a good butt whooping once in a very blue moon. The less kids get spanked,the less discipline they really have. I work at Walmart and I wish I could spank some peoples kids for them. Its necessary sometimes. I love my mom with all my heart. And I agree that that there is a huge difference between spanking and abuse. My momma has whopped me plenty of times, And I appreciate every spanking she’s ever given me. The one thing my mother has NEVER done was abused me. She just raised me the right way.

  5. I give my child a chance to correct her behavior and try to help her correct it. If that doesn’t work, then she does get a spanking. It rarely gets to that point though. My child has better manners than a lot of adults I’ve seen out in public. She says please and thank you and excuse me. I don’t agree with people telling others how they should or should not discipline their children. I also see a lot of comments saying “if you were spanked as a child and think you’re fine, think again”. Who the heck do you think you are telling someone that? You don’t know these people or their parents. Back off.

  6. my parents were married 41 yrs….they raised 3 children that have NEVER been in jail, are NOT drinkers and DON’T do drugs. my brother is a supervisor for a welding shop married for almost 20 yrs, my sister flips houses doing all the work herself and married almost 15 yrs, i am also a supervisor for a major company that spans over 5 states. I personally have never been married but that is my choice…. My brother and sister have both been tested and have ABOVE AVERAGE intelligence. We don’t use our fists to fight our battles, we can all sit down at holidays, weekends or whatever and have conversations with each other. I personally feel that there is a difference in a spanking and all out abuse. I have spanked my children and didn’t think twice….and just so you know here is an example….my daughter and I were walking out of the grocery store. She was about 3. I was holding her hand and carrying a brown bag of groceries. As we come out the door, without any warning she let go of my hand and ran out into the path of the cars. I dropped my bag and went running after her. Yes she got 3 spanks across her backside. I also explained why she got the spanking. AND told her how much I love her!! So YES there is a difference!! Say what ever you want NOBODY is going to tell me how to discipline my children. I WILL NOT BURY MY CHILD. Her actions that day deserved it. And if you knew anything about me…you would know that i am constantly EXPLAINING things to my children about why we do things this way or that way. Asking QUESTIONS to them about why we do something one way or another….i make sure i am very active with them!! So NO them getting a spanking to show discipline i don’t believe will harm them in any way like this article talks about!! I think the mental health issues happen because of more then just a SPANKING !!!

  7. Honestly everyone has there own way of parenting … I personally don’t spank my kids…. But I’m not saying I never have. It’s very rare that I do. Spanking is not a bad thing…. Hitting to hurt…. Is a different story. I don’t agree with the belt or any other objects. I was spanked as a child. I turned out fine. Has anyone noticed the hell this world has become? Back in the day you didn’t have to worry about walking down the street and wonder if some psycho is out there…. Now a days u worry… I think more discipline in the world will show people what’s right and wrong and that there is consequences for there actions. Our world has gone to shit cuz people take things to the extreme. And say spanking is abuse. Spanking on the butt is not abuse leaving a mark or hurting your child intentionally is abuse. There is a line between disciplining and abuse. In some cases it’s not ok.

  8. I spank my children, it is very rare that I have to do this because I try other methods first. That is my last resort, but they are two good children and I get compliments on them from other parents so I must not have done bad. They know the lines, just like as an adult I know my lines of things that are acceptable and things that are not acceptable.

    The largest problem with these younger generations is the fact parents try to be friends with their kids and treat them them at the same level they do an adult, that is crap. I see this is our schools, the disrespect they have for teachers and kids telling teachers they will tell their parents if their teacher gives them silent snack or no playtime. That is a huge problem that needs to be solved, a large majority of parents let their kids rule and then we have these issues.

  9. There’s definitely a fine line between spanking and just plain abuse. I was ” spanked” as a child but let’s just call it abuse because that’s truly what it was. Because I was spanked and disciplined that way, I obviously parent different. There are so many things to take into account when you talk is spanking bad or good. Do you say abusive things when you spank, I mean if you are against spanking but verbally abusing your child that’s not any better. Do you give yourself a limit of where u will spank and how intense? Do you spank for everything that is considered not behaving ? The list goes on. Do I spank ? Yes. Do I always spank no. Where will I spank my children? Only on their bottoms. I prefer the time out method more than anything else because it’s very effective when done correctly and consistently. But there a definitely times where I will spank depending on the situation. But you know what I found? When I ask my children would you rather me spank your bottom or go in time out to think about what you’ve done? They get it. They go there willing and they sit and think about what they have done and they respect me and their father. We don’t spank all the time but I do believe spanking is an effective method when done properly.

  10. I am a firm believer of spanking. My daughter who is almist two years old is a well behaved and well manored child. That didn’t come easy. She is like her father and myself and very hard headed. I don’t spank the first 1-3 times I tell her what she is doing is wrong or not to do something. I spank her when she knows it is wrong agter I corrected her a countless amount of times and she does know better but does it just to do it. I do beleive some people do take it too far but not all parents abuse their children.

  11. I have an almost 3 year old daughter and I refuse to spank her I don’t want her to think that every time someone does something she think is wrong she needs to hit them and my daughter knows when she gets upset she screams in her hands.. She is a great kid does she get into trouble yes but she only stands in the corner and she knows not to do it again .. I don’t think you have to physically punish your child there are many other ways to punish them

  12. Like several people have said. There is a right and wrong way to spank a child. If your spankings led to emotional and psychological problems, then your parents didn’t do it right. A spanking and abuse are different. A lot of you that are against spankings mentioned that you got spanked and now deal with issues. Then your parents abused you or simply did not explain why you got spanked so you never dully understood why you were getting spabked. Also some children don’t need to be spanked! I never needed a spanking simply because I was naturally more obedient … My daughter on the other hand gets spanked. She is extremely strong willed and is constantly talking back and stepping on my toes (she’s 4!)… We just recently. Got over the spanking phase because she is learning through love and discipline (yes, love and discipline do go hand in hand. Very necessary). I could go on for days on this topic but I must sleep Lol. Eat your heart out trolls.


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